Cheese and consequences

I've been cheeging out a lot lately, eating cheese more often than I have in a long time. Reasoning, maybe some people really are just meant to have certain kinds of diets, and the type of food they are really drawn to is what they need. Thinking, if I had to choose one food (or two), on a desert island, I could live on bread and cheese alone.



And you know what else? I've had a cough that won't go away for the entire month of November. It's only gotten more gross and more phlegmy as time oozes cheesily along. This, from someone who as a strict vegan very rarely got sick and even then licked it in a day or two.

I blame cheese, and the various hormones (and other crap they give the animals) that it contains. Also, I'm not getting any more in shape this way. I'm going to try to lay off it.

Stupid, delicious cheese.

Cheese and consequences

I've been cheeging out a lot lately, eating cheese more often than I have in a long time. Reasoning, maybe some people really are just meant to have certain kinds of diets, and the type of food they are really drawn to is what they need. Thinking, if I had to choose one food (or two), on a desert island, I could live on bread and cheese alone.



And you know what else? I've had a cough that won't go away for the entire month of November. It's only gotten more gross and more phlegmy as time oozes cheesily along. This, from someone who as a strict vegan very rarely got sick and even then licked it in a day or two.

I blame cheese, and the various hormones (and other crap they give the animals) that it contains. Also, I'm not getting any more in shape this way. I'm going to try to lay off it.

Stupid, delicious cheese.

The Cheegan Confessional: Leather

Specifically: boots. Ok, I broke down and for the first time in probably 10 years bought a pair of leather boots. Why, you ask, would an animal-loving person such as yourself do such a thing, when there are all these nifty man-made materials these days? My reasons:

Have you seen the prices at Moo Shoes?? (Plus, from my experience, they are not water-proof. Trust me.)
My Payless shoes are death to my feet.
No, I cannot wear used shoes. Sorry, I just can't do it.
Snow + cold + hours in the dog run + canvas sneakers = wet cold miserable feet.

So I just bit the bullet and did it. Do I feel badly? Of course! But what's a girl to do? Don't my feet deserve love? When it's warm out I forego shoes whenever possible, and when necessary wear my un-evironmentally friendly vinyl shoes, but I'm finding I just can't do it in the winter. If I promise to not go on a shoe rampage and turn into a mini Imelda Marcos can I find forgiveness??

TCC: At the movies with popcorn and butter (at home with potato chips and french onion dip and regret)

So I saw "Lassie" last night (which I urge y'all to run out and see right now) and gorged myself on movie popcorn. Ok, so the popcorn and butter was actually vegan because it's that wonderful fake chemical "butter." Maybe not as healthy and good for you as I choose to believe, but vegan, nonetheless. Well, you may ask, why are you confessing to THAT?

And I answer: the popcorn was merely a gateway food.

To tears and popcorn I added bourbon (also vegan and healthy) whilst my friend and I cosied up to a bar and discussed the various merits of dog movies, and then at home, the aforementioned potato chips and dip. French onion dip! I hate onions but I sure love me some french onion dip. And it went down so well, despite the more than vague feeling of nausea from everything else churning about in my stomach. So yes, I am not only a naughty cheegan I am a big fat greedy guts cheegan, eating everything in my path.

Oh, but I paid for it when I woke up with the worst stomach ache ever at about 2:30 in the morning. I do believe God (or whatever) was punishing me. I don't even know if I need to be absolved after paying that price, but I obviously need help . . . .

The Cheegan Confessional: Broccoli Robbed

I'm mostly blaming this on the booze, but I lied to myself and those around me the other night at my once-per-month ladies' get-together night. We were all sitting around one of those big round tables at Congee, sipping wine and eating whatever type of Asian food that is there. (Yeah I'm a racist, to boot.) As promised, they did have some vegetarian options in the myriad dishes presented on the oversized Lazy Susan in the center of our table. Those consisted of bland scallion pancakes and even blander noodles. But then I spied a huge pile of steamed broccoli, and I thought, hey it's HEALTHY. Problem was it was sitting in a puddle of chicken juice. So I decided if I didn't actually spoon any on to my plate, but just sat there rudely picking it off the communal platter, it didn't count. Or taste like chicken.

Cheegan injury

Ya see that? Not the amazing owl crockery scored in Portland, not the awesome lamp I got upstate at a church sale in a town known for its legendary two-headed trout, but that cut on my finger. That's from actually lying in bed being a little too enthusiastic with one of those handled cheese slicers and a wedge of some kind of romano, which along with some popcorn ended up being my dinner, watching the Simpsons, just before another downpour hit, which cemented the nap that was coming anyway, and ensured that I slept all night instead of getting up and doing something.

I'm not proud.

The Cheegan Confessional: You Can't Fight Cheese

The Cheegan Confessional: Coffee - with MILK

Every day (well, weekdays) for the past three weeks I have been drinking coffee, light and sweet and yummy, and does it get that beautiful light creamy color from soymilk? No! Because I am a very very bad vegan. But wait: I do have an excuse (don't we all). Ok, milk is free at work and I am poor. Yes, those dollars I'm saving on soymilk do make a difference right now. Plus I'm, uh, kinda lazy and haven't felt like toting my own soymilk around. That cow milk is just sitting in the fridge here at work, begging me to use it to make iced coffee.

So ok, I confess. I'm a poor excuse for a vegan, I will never become a fifth level vegan and I'm pretty sure I'm going to hell. But man, that coffee is tasty.